You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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