If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize