i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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