that's an acceptable place to lick
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
