matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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