You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
