you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
