You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
be right there i have to get my cape
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
