We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
