Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
