What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
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I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
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So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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