Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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