Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Randomize
