i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
