I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Randomize
