did you get engaged???
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
