you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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