Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
