so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
