Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
