You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
