K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
i think i just lost a toe
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
