Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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