Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
