Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Randomize
