'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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