i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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