Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize