He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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