Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
