I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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