he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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