addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
