this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
