lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
