dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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