I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
