His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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