have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize