You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
