Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
