When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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