Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
