I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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