i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
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Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
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can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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