I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
True college students do jello shots in the library
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
