He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize