I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize