I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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