I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
